tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-50193246276598926342024-03-18T12:20:02.034+00:00Marsden TherapyCounselling, Supervision, Training, Research, Teaching, Writing. Providing therapeutic services to the people of East Lancashire and beyondJohn Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.comBlogger90125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-28602363993826033972013-11-17T15:26:00.001+00:002013-11-17T15:34:12.599+00:00Book Review: Burgo on Defences<p dir="ltr">Burgo, J (2012) <i>Why Do I Do That: Psychological Defense Mechanisms and the Hidden Ways They Shape Our Lives</i>. Chapel Hill, NC: New Rise Press.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Joseph Burgo, psychotherapist and expert blogger, has written a readable, informative, and above all, useful account of our psychological defences - the lies we tell ourselves to avoid emotional pain. He has a gift - you can see it in his blog - to engage with the reader and tranform complex psychological phenomena into understandable and recognisable everyday human processes. This is a good trait in a psychotherapist. In a writer it means the insights of psychoanalysis are available to the reader and he or she can use the book's contents and exercises to begin some self-analysis. The book has helped me to understand the unhelpful ways I protect myself from emotional pain and the costs involved. It offers the possibility of choice - more enriching ways of relating and being in the world, ways that are more in touch with reality. </p>
<p dir="ltr">The defence mechanisms are unconscious and repeating patterns that keep our experience of self and others predictable and safe. Burgo writes about denial, splitting, idealisation and projection as means by which pain is avoided and distressing reality kept at bay through dissociation or by locating it elsewhere, particularly in others. </p>
<p dir="ltr">The book begins with a quiz inviting the reader to explore their own psychological make up and the defences that might accompany the different ways of being. After each chapter there are exercises to help the reader identify how each defence might be being deployed in his or her life. I have found it useful to keep a journal whilst reading the book, for my observations and as a place to do the exercises. As a result I have discovered interesting things about my own defences and learnt to be even more curious about the defences employed by my clients. Like Burgo I believe defences are a part of everyday life, to be expected, even appreciated, after all their intention is a positive one: learnt at times of great stress to keep us functioning; but at a cost and ultimately defences get in the way of seeing and engaging with the world as it really is.</p>
<p dir="ltr">So I can happily recommend Joe Burgo's book, without, I hope, idealising either the book or Joe! </p>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj53GGLGtkcDZ8U_GFVW1Z3F39VKQTGLoNevWpkt2pqYQHB0ObwfCXl8zF-ud1RbzWSW0qDWQOGXbysVnwBZfGGSbE6i709ILnbHUWAMlsH8VC8UgNrc1cctMU26TWhyphenhyphenYC65_ydTCUqXBNA/s1600/BookCoverImage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj53GGLGtkcDZ8U_GFVW1Z3F39VKQTGLoNevWpkt2pqYQHB0ObwfCXl8zF-ud1RbzWSW0qDWQOGXbysVnwBZfGGSbE6i709ILnbHUWAMlsH8VC8UgNrc1cctMU26TWhyphenhyphenYC65_ydTCUqXBNA/s640/BookCoverImage.jpg"> </a> </div>John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-59231110500739195572013-10-26T20:08:00.001+01:002013-10-26T20:20:58.877+01:00The Marsden Window<p dir="ltr">I hope you can see the photo I took today of the whiteboard I was using during some teaching and learning. I've called it <i>The Marsden Window,</i> with a nod to Joe and Harry of Johari Window fame. I'm never sure what the 'share' feature on my phone throws out. </p>
<p dir="ltr">Though <i>The Marsden Window</i> is not particularly original it was effective this morning in communicating an idea I wanted to get across to a great-to-be-with group of counselling students at the University Centre where I work.</p>
<p dir="ltr">One of the drawbacks of a skills based approach to counsellor training, and this has been identified by David Rennie in his book, <i>Person Centred Counselling: an Experiential Approach</i>, is that learners inevitably focus on their next intervention rather than the experience of the client or their connection with the client. Quite often learners resort to asking fairly random questions and once the questioning begins it can be difficult to stop. Turning a counselling session into an interview in which the responsibility for the session and its direction shifts from client to counsellor. This can have a negative impact on the client's autonomy, on the session's emotional depth and on the quality of the connection between client and counsellor. </p>
<p dir="ltr">So I had a brainwave, drawing a window (a square with four quarters to it) on the whiteboard and writing: 'connect to self', 'connect to other', 'core conditions' and 'active listening' in the four compartments. After using this model for a few hours I added another element, drawing a thick black line around the window - the window frame - symbolising the time boundaries and ethical boundaries that must be in place when counselling.</p>
<p dir="ltr">The aim of this model is to shift the focus from <i>doing</i> active listening to <i>being</i> in relationship with the client.</p>
<p dir="ltr">This is achieved by the counsellor connecting first of all to their own feelings and process. To achieve this the counsellor might ask, 'How am I feeling in this moment?' or 'How am I feeling today?' The effect of this is to centre the counsellor or connect the counsellor to his or her feelings and gives the counsellor an opportunity to put difficult feelings to one side and hopefully become more emotionally available, more able to sense the feelings of the client. Students found this very helpful and there was a strong sense of the sessions slowing down and the counsellors becoming more thoughtful. Also cliens became tearful and more emotional and in feedback said they felt supported, listened to and accepted. </p>
<p dir="ltr">The next stage of the model sees the counsellor connect with his or her client. Here the opening question is important and ideally invites the client to do what the counsellor had just done: connect to process and feelings and join the counsellor in this 'place of feelings'.</p>
<p dir="ltr">The next part of the model acknowledges the importance of Rogers' <i>core conditions:</i> the importance of empathic understanding, of accepting and prizing the client, or more importantly of the client feeling accepted and prized. </p>
<p dir="ltr">Then we arrive at active listening, but there is a greater chance that this active listening emerges out of a deep rapport with the client and is imbued with the core conditions.</p>
<p dir="ltr">When using this model I observed a qualitative difference in the way students were listening to each other and a move towards the bellybutton-to-bellybutton communication I was looking for.</p>
<p dir="ltr">I'm going to keep reflecting on the teaching and learning of counselling. A recent Higher Education Academy Report states there is little evidence on the best ways of teaching and learning counselling. It fits also with the research aims of UCBC where I work.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Thanks to the four students I worked with today. I learnt a lot.</p>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcTwFv5i4f4hQgz4YyRHQ8MlpM3E0rNRbKZLlqi_DJRptdRUnDs3MtyUnO975H8lSFEnY7lyPr66LvcqMBoH9u410-BD-EM0OzSUwWdqRBv2Kjp4ebK6Hn8Yjvs4dJVO5A4KApLIIjcPNt/s1600/20131026_163557.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcTwFv5i4f4hQgz4YyRHQ8MlpM3E0rNRbKZLlqi_DJRptdRUnDs3MtyUnO975H8lSFEnY7lyPr66LvcqMBoH9u410-BD-EM0OzSUwWdqRBv2Kjp4ebK6Hn8Yjvs4dJVO5A4KApLIIjcPNt/s640/20131026_163557.jpg"> </a> </div>John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-19935549420095670792013-10-05T19:50:00.001+01:002013-10-06T16:00:03.746+01:00Return of the Blog<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: justify;">
It's been a while since I posted anything on this blog. First there was the pressure of work and then the summer weather was gorgeous and I needed to rest after an intense year of teaching. So I left my desk for the great outdoors - St Anne's on Sea, Morecambe and the local park - where I relaxed and read books unrelated to counselling and mental health. Or so I thought, but as one of my ace students pointed out, Jon Ronson's <i>The Psychopath Test</i>, Rebecca West's <i>The Return of the Soldier</i> and Syvia Plath's <i>The Bell Jar </i>are all psychology related. Plath's novel, by the way, is not only brilliant but as compelling a description of major depression and post traumatic stress as I have ever encountered. </div>
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So, away from my desk, I stopped blogging, tweeting, scooping and all those other social media verbs and enjoyed the warmth of the sun. But now I'm back in the saddle, and like John Wayne in <i>The Searchers</i>, I'm going to hunt down some ideas and present them in future blogs for my own enjoyment and yours too. That might be the first time I have addressed 'the reader' directly (her name's Amanda). </div>
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Farewell for now, I hope you all had a pleasant summer and if any of my new students are visiting this site, welcome aboard!</div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-78212466676123026922013-03-01T23:01:00.000+00:002013-03-02T00:32:04.023+00:00A New NLP Book is Published<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Looks like there's a new NLP book out. Stan Rockwell has reviewed the recently published, <i>NLP: The Essential Guide to Neuro Linguistic Programming</i> at the <a href="https://twitter.com/PsychCentral" target="_blank">@PsychCentral</a> blog. You can read the review <a href="http://psychcentral.com/lib/2013/nlp-the-essential-guide-to-neuro-linguistic-programming/" target="_blank">here</a>. I trotted along to <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Nlp-Essential-Guide-Neuro-Linguistic-Programming/dp/0062083619/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1362175065&sr=8-1" target="_blank">Amazon.co.uk </a>and found the book on sale for £7.58, which is pretty good value for a 464 page book. Conveniently I only remembered my self-imposed </span></span><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">moratorium on book purchases after the thing was bought and leaving the Amazon depot.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Rockwell gives a pretty positive review; he does comment on the amount of jargon filling the pages and that can't be denied; but he he goes on to say that he's been using the techniques described in the book and doing the exercises and they've been working for him. </span></span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">My criticism here is that yet again we have a book re-packaging NLP as an easy guide. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">What we actually need is someone developing new models, researching the effectiveness of what we already </span><span style="background-color: white;">have </span><span style="background-color: white;">or applying NLP in new and interesting contexts - as my friend and colleague Chris Mitchell does in her excellent <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Behaviour-Management-Toolkit-Exclusion/dp/1446210758/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1362176179&sr=8-3" target="_blank">Behaviour Management Toolkit</a> reviewed by me <a href="http://marsdentherapy.blogspot.co.uk/2013/02/chris-parry-mitchell-and-behaviour.html" target="_blank">here</a>. I seem to remember John Grinder, one of the co-founders of NLP, talking in a YouTube clip of the need to 'replenish the well'. It's a good metaphor, as you would expect from Grinder, because of course if everyone draws water and the well is not replenished then eventually the well runs dry.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I've been having a fun time with NLP at the moment. I'm teaching the principles of NLP and drawing on my experience of using NLP as a therapist to groups of psychology students at the college where I work. Teaching this stuff has really helped me reach an even better understanding of NLP. In particular I'm really appreciating the 'explanatory power' of the approach when, for example, the class and I explore the psychology of negative emotional states - often called 'disorders' - though 'differently ordered' might be a better term; and I'm appreciating the creativity of NLP and the strengths based approach to therapeutic work: helping clients to access resources and creating choice about how they'd like to feel.</span></span></div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-37062873888579017082013-02-23T16:28:00.001+00:002013-02-26T00:11:11.673+00:00Chris Parry-Mitchell and The Behaviour Management Toolkit<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I have been good friends with Chris Mitchell for a while now and this week had the pleasure of her company over coffee and a cup of tea in Blackburn's nicest cafe, The Coffee Exchange. It was great to see her again, happy and healthy. It was a great chance to catch up, and for me to talk at length about David Allen's book, <i>Getting Things Done, </i>and my personal quest to improve workflow and productivity. Not only did Chris stay awake during this (and she was drinking tea, not coffee) but she listened and gave good advice and inspired me to make changes; but what else would one expect from the author of <i><a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Behaviour-Management-Toolkit-Exclusion/dp/1446210758/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1361635234&sr=8-3" target="_blank">The Behaviour Management Toolkit</a></i>? </div>
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I have to declare an interest at this stage, because not only is Chris a friend of mine, but we also share a common perspective on working with people and have similar training, often with the same Neuro Linguisitc Programming (NLP) practitioners and trainers. Indeed there are many similarities between Chris's work on avoiding exclusion from school and the <i>Proactive Carer Programme</i> I developed and delivered with my friend, Adam Gibson of <a href="http://www.lancashirecounselling.com/" target="_blank">Lancashire Counselling Services</a>. Both draw on NLP and Transactional Analysis and both share a common ethos, the fundamental principle that if you help people develop resources they will have more choices and their behaviour and circumstances will change in positive ways. There are other shared principles: the power of groups and group work and the need for passionate and committed leadership that encourages and equips individuals with the knowledge and skills to make small but significant changes. I often use a metaphor that someone gifted to me, that if you sail from Portsmouth to New York and you're one degree out at the beginning of your voyage, you'll be in a different country by the time you've crossed the Atlantic. Fine if you don't mind landing in Canada, but you get the idea: small changes over time yield significant results.</div>
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So what's in <i>The Behaviour Management Toolkit</i> and how useful might it be to teachers and trainers working with young people at the point of being excluded from mainstream education? It's a ten session programme, with all the handouts and worksheets on a CD-ROM taped to the back page. It aims to equip young people with the insight and skills needed to make different decisions, change their behaviour and get better outcomes. Almost 300 children have been through the programme run by Chris in Preston, Lancashire, and more than 80% of those have remained in education. Now this could be the programme, it could be the expertise of Chris and her two colleagues, John and 'Swifty' (Andrew 'Swifty' Swift is an old student of mine, but I take no credit for the excellent practitioner he has become). More likely it's a combination of these factors as well as the potential all young people have to seize an opportunity to change when they are given the chance by adults who appreciate their struggles and care about their futures!</div>
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<i>The Behaviour Management Toolkit </i>applies some classic NLP patterns: the Mercedes Model, submodality shifts and an extremely effective perceptual positions exercise to educate group members about their own thoughts and feelings, the impact of their behaviour on others and why that matters. It uses ideas from TA (warm fuzzies, cold pricklies, the Drama Triangle and game playing) to help young people understand and take responsibility for how they communicate. Each session begins with participants identifying and sharing their achievements that week, creating positive feelings, generating positive feedback and helping to change internal filters so a young person starts to notice what's going well in their lives and not just what's going badly. The whole programme is well put together, so each session builds on the previous one and models learnt early in the programme are reapplied later on. Chris says she responded to feedback from her young participants, making changes and increasing the programme's relevance and effectiveness. I think it's a superb piece of work, but the ultimate test is, does it work? Well, the statistics and the participants' feedback says it does; and whenever I've visited the project I've noticed an atmosphere that's warm and safe and purposeful, and the young people I've met there are full of praise for Chris and her team.</div>
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I hope practitioners working with hurt young people and their sometimes challenging behaviour make use of the <i>Toolkit</i>. In a previous career I delivered offender programmes for the National Probation Service. These were based on the principles of Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, an approach I much admire, but which, in that context, lacked the optimism and the humanistic underpinning found in <i>The Behaviour Management Toolkit. </i>I use it when teaching NLP based interventions to students on the BA (Hons) degree <i>Working with Children and Young People </i>at <a href="http://www.blackburn.ac.uk/higher-education/" target="_blank">The University Centre at Blackburn College</a>, a course that 'Swifty' graduated from several years ago! Congratulations to Chris Mitchell and her team, changing lives and living your mission!</div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-64132300414339398392013-02-07T22:29:00.002+00:002013-02-07T22:36:46.753+00:00Guest Post: Carl Newsham reviews Relational Depth: New Perspectives and Developments<br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
took delivery of my brand new copy of this title on the day of release a few
weeks ago (07/01/13) after pre-ordering on the back of an e-mail prompt from
Amazon. As I was the first to receive it, and John (my tutor) is busy marking our latest
round of assignments! I am offered the opportunity to review the book for
inclusion on this page, a privilege indeed!</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I first came across the notion of Relational Depth in the
3</span><sup style="line-height: 115%;">rd</sup><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> edition of Mearns and Thorne’s </span><i style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Person-Centred Counselling in Action </i><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">(2008)
which led me to Mearns and Cooper’s </span><i style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Working
at relational depth in Counselling and Psychotherapy</i><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> (2005) which is, up to
now, the only complete book fully dedicated to the phenomena as named.</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Relational depth is described most succinctly as “</span><i style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">a state of profound contact and engagement
between two people, in which each person is fully real with the Other, and able
to understand and value the Other’s</i><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span><i style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">experience
at a high level</i><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">.” (Mearns & Cooper 2005). This is to say that it can be
experienced by anyone in any relationship providing the right conditions and
sufficient depth is present. But what are the right conditions? What amount of
depth is sufficient? And, can anyone really say what relational depth actually
is? In terms of the therapeutic relationship; can relational depth be measured?
Can a therapist do anything to encourage the phenomena to emerge in session?
And, how is it perceived as valuable by the client in therapy? This is a
collection of recent studies, experiences and essays based around the concept
of relational depth which attempt to explore the subject further.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Divided into three parts, the book groups together an
eclectic mix of reflections, suggested techniques and related perspectives to
inform us of the state of current thinking about and practice uses of the
topic. Part 1 begins with each author describing an actual moment of relational
depth from practice; this really brings the book to life: case examples are
more meaningful to me than a description of what I have referred to earlier as
a notion. I found passages here that I could relate to from my own practice and
from this chapter onwards I felt part of the team, comfortable in the knowledge
that I had known relational depth personally. Part one moves away from the
softly-softly approach from chapter two onwards with a study by Rosanne Knox
focusing on the clients perspective of relational depth complete with
flow-charts concluding that the impact of relational depth on the client can
alter the feeling of isolation and facilitate movement towards re-connection
with the self within the client. Chapter four introduces the Relational Depth
Inventory (RDI) as proposed and researched by Sue Wiggins, a concept so brave I
actually had to read the chapter a few times! To create a psychological measure
for such a concept is akin to counting raindrops, I do marvel at finalised 24
item questionnaire produced from the study, I want to know more. Mick Cooper
rounds off part one with a precautionary discussion about trying to capture
empirical data from such a holistic and complex phenomena should we, as
humanistic therapists, be happy for relational depth to remain elusive and in
the moment.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Part two moves on to looking at relational depth in
context moving back to the various author’s areas of expertise using real
examples from the therapy room. Sue Hawkins explores the concept of it in
therapeutic relationships with children and young adults, people whose use of
language as a means of expression is as yet under-developed, relying on the
unspoken elements of communication. Further chapters look at relational depth
in groups and in supervision. The recurring themes in this part really underline
the importance of relationship in therapy and the provision of Rogers’ ‘core
conditions’ (1951). The essential nature of positive regard, acceptance or
Thorne’s ‘tenderness’ (1991) in creating the right environment for relational
depth to occur really shines through sending this reader back to basics for a
re-cap.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The final part of the book is a collection of related
perspectives to the central theme beginning in chapter 12 with a philological
look at the language of the Person-Centred Approach by Peter F. Schmid arguing
that the essence of person-centered<i>ness</i>
is dialogical, bringing a balance to the book overall as previous chapters very
much lean towards the unspoken aspects that are and surround relational depth.
Further chapters discuss therapeutic presence and mutuality as a foundation for
relational depth<i> </i>in turn both
discussing the underlying construct of the therapeutic relationship. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 19px; line-height: 21px;">In conclusion, the book presents a very modern look at a very old concept. The chapters are tight, concise and relevant to any practising therapist in today’s fast-paced society. For students I would say this is a must and will be due to appear on a reading list near you very soon! It is refreshing to find expert insight such as this in such a friendly format.</span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Relational-Depth-New-Perspectives-Developments/dp/0230279392/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1360275376&sr=8-1" target="_blank">Knox,R., Murphy, D., Wiggins, S. & Cooper, M. (eds.) (2013) Relational Depth: New Perspectives and Developments. Hampshire: Palgrave McMillan.</a></span></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Carl Newsham is studying Counselling with Brief Interventions at the University Centre at Blackburn College and is a trainee counsellor specialising in the person centred approach with clients living with drug and alcohol dependency issues.</i></span></div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-36772359906348967142013-02-03T17:03:00.001+00:002013-03-02T00:30:10.883+00:00American Counselling Association Podcasts: Gestalt Therapy<object align="middle" classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" codebase="http://fpdownload.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,0,0" height="25" id="mp3playerdarksmallv3" width="210">
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<a href="http://www.podbean.com/" style="border-bottom: none; color: #2da274; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; font-weight: normal; padding-left: 41px; text-decoration: none;">Podcast Powered By Podbean</a>
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The American Counselling Association have published a great series of podcasts, on a range of counselling related topics. You can check them out here:</div>
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<a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/aca-podcast-series/id288394528" target="_blank">iTunes</a></h4>
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I'm making my way through them, and the first one to really grab me is Jon Frew talking to Rebecca Daniel-Burke about Gelstalt therapy. He isn't too complimentary about the showmanship of Fritz Perls, the man usually credited with the creation of the Gestalt approach. Instead Frew gives much of the credit for the development of Gestalt therapy to Laura Perls, the wife of the much more famous Fritz. So this is a great interview and very informative about the history and the contemporary practice of Gestalt therapy</div>
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<span style="font-size: 13px;">According to the American Counselling Association Website, Dr Jon Frew is in private practice in Vancouver, Washington, and is a Professor at Pacific University School of Professional Psychology. He completed the three-year Post Graduate Training Program at the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland in 1981. He has conducted workshops and led training groups in the United States, Canada, and Australia. He is the author of numerous articles on Gestalt therapy, theory, and practice, and is on the editorial board of the journal </span><em>Gestalt Review</em><span style="font-size: 13px;">.</span></div>
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Running time: 54:45</div>
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Date Recorded: 01/24/2012</div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-25543751213431031852013-01-27T17:39:00.001+00:002013-01-27T17:47:58.437+00:00Book Review: The Examined Life by Stephen Grosz<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This little book of case studies has created a buzz in the small world of counselling and psychotherapy. It's been reviewed by the Guardian <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2013/jan/18/the-examined-life-stephen-grosz-review#comment-20719900" target="_blank">here</a>, by the Observer <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2013/jan/27/examined-life-stephen-grosz-review" target="_blank">here</a> and by Rory of <a href="http://counsellingtutor.com/">counsellingtutor.com</a> <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OS8-uK4JGLg" target="_blank">here</a>. Chapters have also been broadcast on BBC Radio Four's<i> Book of the Week</i> and can still be heard on the Marsden Therapy Podbean page <a href="http://marsdentherapy.podbean.com/" target="_blank">here</a>.</div>
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I'll start my review by mentioning a major reservation I have about the book in respect of client confidentiality. I accept that Grosz has protected the anonymity of his clients by changing names and details. I don't know how well disguised his clients are or whether they would recognise their private tribulations within the pages of his book. I don't know whether Grosz obtained consent from his clients or if his clients knew when they attended psychotherapy that Grosz was collecting stories for a future publication.Maybe Grosz didn't know that either. It's a mistake to think that anonymity is the same as confidentiality. Whilst anonymity protects the identity of the client, the principle of confidentiality guards not only the client's identity but - within limits - everything the client says. Of course one of the book's selling points is that it provides an insight into the private world of psychotherapy, but I remained uneasy as I read these very personal case histories, transformed into very beautiful stories.</div>
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The book itself contains thirty-one brief chapters in which the author considers both the process of psychotherapy and the lives of his clients. With deep understanding he reflects on what he finds there, pointing out the unconscious motivations behind human behaviour, showing how apparently irrational choices make sense in the wider context of early experience and the need to protect the individual from something much worse. So jealousy protects us from the fear of being abandoned and paranoia guards us against the fear of being alone. Sometimes Grosz's conclusions are ingenious, sometimes speculative, but always thought provoking. There is great wisdom and humanity in this book. Reading the book as a counsellor I was inspired and encouraged to keep listening to my clients and to continue helping them to tell their stories. </div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-34347682056064489242013-01-23T23:55:00.002+00:002013-01-24T00:11:11.403+00:00Suicide Prevention in Blackburn with Darwen<br />
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">I attended a mini conference on suicide prevention at <a href="http://www.blackburn.gov.uk/Pages/Home.aspx" target="_blank">Blackburn Town Hall</a> yesterday. There were representatives from a range of health and social services. I was there with a couple of colleagues from <a href="http://www.blackburn.ac.uk/" target="_blank">Blackburn College</a>. I noticed that my old employer, <a href="http://www.probation-lancashire.org.uk/" target="_blank">The National Probation Service</a>, was missing, which was a shame given that the workshop I attended was on reducing the risk of suicide within the criminal justice system.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">The aim of the event was to consider how Blackburn with Darwen Borough Council and our own organisations might respond to <a href="http://www.dh.gov.uk/prod_consum_dh/groups/dh_digitalassets/@dh/@en/documents/digitalasset/dh_4019548.pdf" target="_blank">The </a></span><span style="font-family: Tahoma;"><a href="http://www.dh.gov.uk/prod_consum_dh/groups/dh_digitalassets/@dh/@en/documents/digitalasset/dh_4019548.pdf" target="_blank">National Suicide Strategy</a>. In workshops</span><span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;"> we discussed how we could work together to reduce the number of suicides in our town and the dreadful impact that each of those has on our community.</span></div>
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<span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;"><span style="font-family: Tahoma;">The first speaker was Chief Superintendent </span><a href="http://www.lancashiretelegraph.co.uk/resources/images/1171102/?type=articleLandscape" style="font-family: Tahoma;" target="_blank">Bob Eastwood</a><span style="font-family: Tahoma;">, Lancashire Constabulary Divisional Commander responsible for policing in East Lancashire. He spoke movingly about a colleague who had committed suicide and the impact of their death on family, friends and colleagues. It was pretty clear that Chief Superintendent Eastwood had been deeply affected by this and by the numerous incidents he'd attended at which someone had taken their own life. The impact of suicide ripples out across society. The other startling point made by Mr Eastwood was that sometimes all of his on-duty officers are engaged looking for or attending to suicidal people. He explained that suicide is traumatic and preventing suicide has significant resource implications for his organisation. </span></span></div>
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<span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">The next speaker was Emma Thompson, the Borough's population health analyst. She gave a presentation on suicide as a global, national and local problem. In </span><span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">Blackburn with Darwen there were </span><span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">18 suicides across the Borough in 2010 - thirteen of those were male and five were female. On examining the figures for suicide in Blackburn over the last ten years a number of features emerge. She said that most were under the age of 45, 75% were male,</span><span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;"> 27% were single, 34% lived alone and 70% could be defined as 'white British'.</span></div>
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In the workshop I attended on suicide and the criminal justice system it became clear that the police are<span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;"> struggling to cope with their role as first responders. Often their appearance exacerbates the situation. A Chief Inspector said his officers really struggled with non-statutory offenders specifically and with distressed and suicidal people in general. He said there was a pressing need for speedy assessment and for a referral pathway. We thought there was a place for volunteers in supporting suicidal people, but the work would be complex and challenging.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma;"><i style="font-style: italic;"><a href="http://www.livingworks.net/" target="_blank">Living Works</a> </i>talked to us about the s<span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">uicide prevention training they offered. They offered three major programmes:</span></span></div>
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<li><span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">suicideTalk - awareness raising, one or two hours duration, groups of 30 to 50</span></li>
<li><span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">safeTalk - a step up from suicideTalk, a programme designed to give people the confidence to talk about suicide with people at risk.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">ASIST ... a two day course involving role play, designed to give people the skills to work with suicidal people based on the principles of connecting, understanding and assisting.</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">The aim of <i>Living Works</i> is to create a network of helpers in the community. They said '</span><span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">help seeking' is encouraged by open, honest and direct talk about suicide. They also said that the relationship between the helper and the suicidal person is key! The presentation ended on a positive note: 'No matter how despairing someone feels there is always a reason to live'.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">The final speaker </span><span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">was Shirley Goodhew, Public Health Development Manager for <a href="http://www.bwd.nhs.uk/" target="_blank">NHS Blackburn with Darwen</a>, speaking about </span><span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">risk factors for suicide: </span><span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">job loss, debt, social isolation, bereavement (especially for older people), family breakdown and imprisonment. Clearly a key risk factor for suicide was LOSS in its many forms. She said s</span><span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;"><span style="font-family: Tahoma;">tigma and bullying are aggravating factors.</span></span></div>
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<span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;"><span style="font-family: Tahoma;">I left the conference feeling that agencies in the Borough had a long way to go if they were ever to work together effectively to safe-guard those at risk of suicide; but I left feeling that I had a part to play and I intend to book myself onto a <i>Living Works</i> training programme as soon as possible because, as the Chief Inspector said, 'Every life matters'.</span></span></div>
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John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-52364786754851422692013-01-20T13:55:00.001+00:002013-01-20T22:20:48.966+00:00Some thoughts on Leon Benjamin's 'Building brand me?'<br />
<iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="356" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" mozallowfullscreen="mozallowfullscreen" scrolling="no" src="http://www.slideshare.net/slideshow/embed_code/16081033" style="border-width: 1px 1px 0; border: 1px solid #CCC; margin-bottom: 5px;" webkitallowfullscreen="webkitallowfullscreen" width="427"> </iframe> <br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 5px;">
<strong> <a href="http://www.slideshare.net/ixtlan/how-do-i-build-brand-me" target="_blank" title="How do I build brand me?">How do I build brand me?</a> </strong> from <strong><a href="http://www.slideshare.net/ixtlan" target="_blank">Winning by Sharing</a></strong> </div>
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Leon Benjamin, a blogger at <a href="http://winningbysharing.typepad.com/oaxaca/2013/01/how-do-i-build-brand-me.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+typepad%2FkQth+%28Winning+by+Sharing%29" target="_blank">Winning by Sharing </a>has posted an excellent presentation, <a href="http://www.slideshare.net/ixtlan/how-do-i-build-brand-me">How do I build brand me?</a>, on Slideshare. It contains some very useful and (for me) timely advice on social media networking and prompted me to add the following (now, slightly edited) comment:<br />
<br />
<span class="commentText h-comment-text notranslate" style="background-color: white; color: #3b3835; display: block; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 5px 0px 5px 60px; width: 500px;">Thanks Leon, seeing your blog and Slideshare has been timely for me. I spend a lot of time sharing links, writing posts and creating resources for my students and to build my reputation as a counsellor who is passionate, committed and knowledgeable about the profession of counselling. I have evidence from students, clients and colleagues that this is successful, but your blog and presentation has helped me to be patient, focus on the process rather than the outcome and to remember that influence cannot always be measured by immediate reactions and change. In fact these principles apply as much to client work in counselling as they do to my involvement with social media. And the fact that I am now thinking, 'This could make a good blog post' shows how much I have begun to think in terms of creation, curation and sharing. Best wishes, <a href="http://www.slideshare.net/MarsdenTherapy" rel="nofollow" style="border: 0px; color: #0077aa; font-family: inherit; line-height: 1; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: initial;" target="_blank" title="John Marsden">@MarsdenTherapy</a></span><br />
<span class="commentMeta h-comment-meta" style="background-color: white; color: #888888; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; line-height: 18px; margin: 0px 0px 10px 60px;"></span><br />
So, here I am creating the very post I mentioned in my comment. I think this is an example of why I like social media and its networking potential. I'll make a list:<br />
<ul>
<li>I have Tweeted the link to Leon's blog on my Twitter feed to alert my followers to something interesting I've found on the Web. I'm particularly thinking of those followers who are also colleagues at the University Centre, Blackburn College and interested in developing Open Educational Resources (OERs) and using social media to engage learners.</li>
<li>I have followed Leon on Twitter, 'liked' his Facebook page, added his blog to my feed, added his blog to my newsletter on Scoop.it and subscribed to his Slideshares. So I'm now 'connected' and have expanded my network. He may or may not subscribe to any of my social media sites but either way I'm going to be notified whenever he uploads content.</li>
<li>Finally here I am embedding Leon's content in my own site and adding my own reactions. For me this is fun but it's also learning.</li>
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So, I shall continue giving time and attention to my social media accounts. It's fun to create and curate; it enables me to connect with colleagues from across the world; I'm able to engage with different opinions and experiences, new ideas and research; it develops my writing and critical thinking skills; and builds my reputation as a counsellor, supervisor and teacher who is working at being authentic and is certainly passionate about his work ... </div>
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Now ... I need to add this to my blog and post a link on Twitter ...</div>
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<br />John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-55845600113726303822013-01-16T03:52:00.000+00:002013-01-17T22:15:32.222+00:00Reflections on Bradshaw and Toxic Shame<br />
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With some trepidation and for the third time in my career I entered counselling before Christmas. My counsellor is an advocate
of ‘inner child work’ and recommended this John Bradshaw book. I’ve read
Bradshaw before because fifteen years ago, when I was training to be a counsellor, ‘healing the
wounded child’ was very much in vogue. When I read Bradshaw the first time
around I was not impressed. It seemed superficial, quasi-religious and a
cobbling together of numerous therapeutic models and techniques. Those
objections largely remain. I’m not in sympathy with Bradshaw’s twelve-step
approach, his patronising of gay people, his theocentric world-view or his conservative beliefs about sex . The biggest sticking point, however, is Bradshaw’s view of shame.</div>
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Bradshaw says that shame is toxic
or demonic. In other words, the thoughts, feelings and behviours of individuals
repeatedly shamed in early life become shame-based. Shame becomes part of the individual’s
identity. Shame is the belief that, ‘I am a flawed human being’. Whilst I agree
with Bradshaw's idea of toxic shame and I like the idea of shame as demonic, I
struggle with Bradshaw’s corresponding idea of ‘healthy shame’. He argues that
the shame we feel when contemplating a wicked act stops us doing wicked things. I can accept that anticipatory guilt serves as a useful emotion helping to keep us out of gaol, but a shame-based reaction seems over the top, harmful and destructive.
Is it healthy to feel shame in Tesco at the thought of eating a grape from the
bunch you haven’t yet paid for?<o:p></o:p></div>
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Despite these reservations I gave
Bradshaw my best attention. I found his exploration of toxic shame in part one of
the book illuminating and I could relate to what he was saying. But as he described
shame in all its forms and identified the ways shame is passed down the
generations and internalised, I began to feel pretty miserable.<o:p></o:p></div>
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In chapter one Bradshaw argues
that to combat toxic shame - the belief that I am a flawed human being
- an individual creates a false self to
escape his or her shame laden identity. In chapter two Bradshaw expands on his view of shame,
describing how it manifests at different stages in an individual's development.
It’s in this chapter that his views on gay people - he identifies 'normal' children and gay and lesbian children - feel patronising.</div>
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I like his idea about the toxically shamed becoming either 'more than human' (ie perfect and superior) or
'less than human' (ie flawed and defective). I remember an offender I once worked
with who protected himself from the truth of his awful crime and the judgement of others by
assuming an attitude of self-abasement. Bradshaw describes this as 'grandiosity'
and says, "It can appear as narcissistic self-enlargement or worm-like
helplessness" (41). <o:p></o:p></div>
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Bradshaw expands on his idea
of the false self. He says, "To be severed and alienated within oneself
also creates a sense of unreality. One may have an all-pervasive sense of never
quite belonging, of being on the outside looking in. The condition of inner
alienation and isolation is also pervaded by a low-grade chronic depression.
This has to do with the sadness of losing one's authentic self. Perhaps the
deepest and most devastating aspect of neurotic shame is the rejection of the
self by the self" (34).<o:p></o:p></div>
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The cobbling together of multiple
theories is much in evidence here. Bradshaw borrows from NLP, CBT, the
psycho-dynamic approach and from humanistic psychology. He refers to Seligman's
'learned helplessness' as well as Harry
Stack Sullivan, Alice Miller and Scott Peck. Does this amount to theoretical
incoherence? It’s what might be called a kitchen sink approach to the problem
of shame. My reaction was to visit Amazon at regular intervals to buy
the books Bradshaw was referencing. I concluded that these ideas
might be better appreciated in the original context.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Bradshaw links toxic shame to the discourse on 'being' v 'doing'. He says
the false self necessitates a life based on externals - doing and achieving -
whilst 'being' depends on the inner life. Bradshaw quotes (or misquotes) scripture: 'The kingdom of heaven is within'
[Luke 17:21]. <o:p></o:p><br />
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Chapter three is a long chapter in
which Bradshaw writes about the family system as a source of shame. He describes how shame is passed down the generations and illustrates this with a composite 'client' called Max (an 'Everyman' of toxic shame). <o:p></o:p></div>
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There is an interesting section
on 'families as social systems' which I think I have read before and stored
away. It formed the basis of what I was saying to a recent client
about his situation. In particular the principle of dynamic homeostasis:
"whenever a part of the system is out of balance, the rest of the members
of the system will try and bring it into balance" (52). Bradshaw goes on
to write about 'shame-based family rules' and lists them (62-63). He also
writes about shame as a state of being and describes the three steps that lead
to internalised or toxic shame:<o:p></o:p></div>
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<ol>
<li>Identification with
shame-based models [parents, family structures, roles, rules] and the carrying
of unexpressed shame</li>
<li>The trauma of abandonment -
shame binding all one's feelings, needs and drives</li>
<li>The interconnection and
magnification of visual memories or scenes and the retaining of shaming
auditory and kinaesthetic imprints (64).</li>
</ol>
<span style="text-align: justify;">Bradshaw writes (68) about
children being sensitive to the needs of parents: 'By taking on the role of
supplying his shame-based parent's narcissistic gratification, the child
secures love and and a sense of being needed and not abandoned'. Paradoxically the
child is actually abandoned since his or her needs are no longer being met. I was
reminded at this point of Ferenzci's writing on the 'Wise Baby' syndrome. Bradshaw certainly provides a good description of abandonment trauma and its many manifestations.</span><o:p></o:p><br />
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Bradshaw says something
interesting about emotions (1) they monitor our basic needs, and (2) they give
us energy to act (Bradshaw uses the term e-motion, 'energy in motion'). He says our true sense of self depends on feeling authentic feelings; but
when our feelings are shame-bound (marked by internalise shame) instead
of real feelings we experience scripted feelings – we have to ask ourselves ‘How should
I feel?’ I can identify
with this.When I started counsellor training in 1997 I was was cut off from my
feelings and how others felt was purely guess work!<br />
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In chapter four Bradshaw
identifies the various ways we cope with toxic shame, the various covers we have, which he refers to, in the Freudian tradition, as primary and
secondary ego defences. He goes on to list them, but I shall refer you to page 104 of the book.</div>
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In part two - 'Recovery and Uncovery Process' – things take a more positive turn and my mood began
life. To begin with Bradshaw invites
readers to join a twelve-stop programme or see a therapist as a means of 'coming
out'. I have difficulty accepting the principles underpinning the twelve-step
programme as advocated by Bradshaw. As an agnostic I have difficulty with the
'higher power' stuff found in the twelve steps and 'God however I understand it'
doesn't quite work for me. </div>
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I know this is controversial and the Twelve Steps has helped millions, but suppose I choose the natural world as
my higher power. In step seven of a twelve step programme I'm
expected to ask my higher power for help to correct my shortcomings. So
whatever none-Godlike alternative I choose I am expected to imbue that choice
with Godlike qualities. That doesn't fit for me. More generally I do not share Bradshaw’s
theo-centric view of things or attribute moral agency to the universe as he does. It's
part of an existential view of things: we exist in a universe that is morally
neutral and without inherent purpose; our task is to find purpose and meaning.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Things really pick up in chapter seven.
Bradshaw writes about corrective work. He tells us about grief work and there's a
nice guided trance on meeting our inner child. He writes about corrective
experiences (eg a network of male friends to correct the lack of a positive
male influence as a child). He also uses the NLP collapsing anchors technique to
help add resources and transform memories of toxic shame. I have begun listing toxic
shame-based memories and my friend Jean Clements has agreed to use her EMDR skills on
each of them.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Chapter eight is about integrating
disowned parts. It covers ‘Voice Dialogue Work’, ‘Owning Projections’ and
Virginia Satir’s famous ‘Parts Party’ from her book, <i>Your Many Faces</i>, which has been ordered from Amazon this very night.
Chapter nine is entitled 'Confronting and Changing Your Toxic Inner Voices' and
begins with an interesting account of the 'fantasy bond'. <o:p></o:p></div>
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When refering to the ‘fantasy
bond’ Bradshaw is using the work of Robert Firestone. Basically the notion that
one's parents are uncaring is unacceptable to a child. In order to survive the child idealises the parent and turns himself into the 'bad guy' (201). Bradshaw uses a metaphor to clarify what he means. He says the fantasy bond is like a mirage in the desert: 'It gives the
child the illusion there is nourishment and support in his life' (201). Years
later when the child leaves his parents the fantasy bond is set up internally -
the voice of the scolding parent is given the task of shaming and re-shaming the
child. As Firestone says, 'The child incorporates "the attitudes the
parents held when they felt the most rejecting and angry. The daughter or son
incorporates feelings of loathing and degradation that lie behind their statements"'
(201).This is powerful stuff!<o:p></o:p></div>
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On page 203 Bradshaw brings in
CBT and Beck's idea of 'selective abstraction' - maintaining
ones focus on a particular group of automatic thoughts to the exclusion of all
other thoughts. There follows a series of exercises on identifying and challenging the inner
critic, including the thought stoppers technique (208) and positive
affirmations (219). He goes to provide a useful list of cognitive distortions based on
the work of Albert Ellis and Aaron Beck. I like the observation that Bradshaw
makes here: 'You imagine that people feel as bad about you as you do about
yourself' (213). I also like an excellent analogy he uses between shame-based
egocentric thinking and terrible tooth ache: when you have tooth ache you
become 'tooth-centric'.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Chapter ten is entitled:
'Choosing to Love and Forgive Yourself for Your Mistakes' (223) and includes
advice on giving yourself 'time and attention', becoming assertive, reframing
mistakes and mindfulness (the habit of awareness). These are short chapters with Bradshaw’s Christian thinking looming large once more. In chapter eleven
Bradshaw writes about toxic shame in relationships, suggesting that: 'Intimacy
is the number one problem resulting from internalised shame' (235) and, ‘There
is no greater potential for painful shame than rejection' (247)<o:p></o:p></div>
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In part three - Spiritual
Awakening - the Discovery Process – Bradshaw argues that true release from
shame-based thinking can only come when there is a spiritual awakening in the
person. Bradshaw goes on to explain why shame hangs around
sex. He talks about shameless sex and de-personalised sex, which he thinks
is 'using people for enjoyment' (though if this is consensual and mutual, why
is that a problem?). He argues for sexual relations characterised by the I-thou relationship of
Martin Buber. This seems a fairly conservative, family-values approach
to sex. Is it not possible to have a mixture of life-sustaining, long-term I-thou
relationships and shame-free no-strings attached mutually enjoyable sex?<o:p></o:p></div>
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So the book ends with the return
of Bradshaw's religious tone and I ended the book with the feeling, 'this isn't for me'. But that's a generalisation. Actually, whilst parts of the book were irksome, other parts were incredibly
helpful to me in my personal development work and I intend to read the book again and
spend even more time on the exercises Bradshaw has included. I would certainly recommend it to
others (and have done) but I'm also looking forward to reading the many books Bradshas refers to as he rolls along, and which now form a tidy pile on my coffee table, because they may give me the detail and the coherence I'm after.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Bradshaw, J. (2005) <i>Healing the Shame That Binds You</i>, Deerfield Beach, Florida, BCI Books.</div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-18460696339957643002013-01-04T03:31:00.000+00:002013-01-04T03:31:02.724+00:00Sapolsky on Depression<iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/NOAgplgTxfc" width="560"></iframe><br />
<br />
Here we have an excellent video from Stanford University in which Professor Robert Sapolsky lectures on the biology and psychology of depression. He argues that major depression is the most severe of diseases afflicting mankind. He examines its causality, rooting major depression in biology (genes, hormones and neuro-transmitters) and psychology (referring to Freud's M<i>ourning and Melencholia </i>and Seligman's work on learned helplessness), He concludes that stress is a trigger for depression, with those of us genetically vulnerable particularly susceptible to depression, initially as a reaction to significant life events and trauma and then as part of a cycling depressive disorder.John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-55098267827714019972013-01-02T09:09:00.000+00:002013-01-02T09:11:33.833+00:00Visualisation in Person Centred Counselling - The Approach of David Rennie 3 of 3<!-- copy and paste. Modify height and width if desired. -->
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Here is my third and final screencast on the Person Centred Approach of David Rennie. Here I outline his use of visualisation - were the counsellor (if appropriate) shares the visual images and metaphors evoked in him or her by the client's story. Rennie suggests this can lead to 'vertical development' - a deeper exploration of the client's material as he or she pauses to reflect on what the counsellor has offered and how it relates to their recollection of the experience.</div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-85208721089099336252012-12-18T23:08:00.001+00:002012-12-18T23:11:17.798+00:00David Rennie's Approach: Meta-Communication in Person Centred Counselling - Screencast 2/3<!-- copy and paste. Modify height and width if desired. -->
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Second of my screencasts highlighting the work of David Rennie. In this presentation I briefly describe the use of meta-communication in person centred counselling.John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-64969296222244028282012-12-13T15:35:00.003+00:002012-12-13T15:37:37.568+00:00David Rennie's Approach - Process Identification in Person Centred Counselling - Screencast 1/3<!-- copy and paste. Modify height and width if desired. -->
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This Screencast is a presentation I have created about David Rennie's work on <b>process identification</b>. Students at the University Centre at Blackburn College studying for the foundation degree in Counselling with Brief Interventions are exploring the work of Rennie as a way of deepening the level of exploration happening in their sessions.John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-55949009049901800102012-11-22T12:41:00.006+00:002012-11-22T12:41:58.368+00:00Mindfulness<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Last Sunday my friend, counselling colleague and peer supervisor, Mrs Jean Clements of Burnley, drove down the motorway, Google's directions in hand, for a Mindfulness workshop in South Manchester. </div>
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It was a lovely day, cold and crisp and sunny. We arrived at Aileen's Mindfulness training to be greeted by the most beautiful, golden-coloured cocker spaniel by the name of Ruby. Each time the training session began and it was time for Ruby to be put in a separate room she would come and sit by me for protection - clearly a good judge of character, you cannot fool our canine friends! It did no good - she was still shut in her room. </div>
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A nice surprise was to see one of my students there - Fleur - who had alerted me to the training and who fell in love with Ruby as we all did and later in the day took her for a walk.</div>
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The Mindfulness workshop began with eight students and two facilitators choosing a sultana. We were then given our first lesson in Mindfulness. Obviously my initial thought had I not been in a Mindfulness workshop would have been to throw the sultana into my mouth and swallow it down. In fact I cannot remember putting a single sultana in my mouth - why would you when a handful can be eaten instead? We were encouraged to roll the sultana around the palm of our hands, smell it, place it on the lips and to put it in the mouth to taste it, then bite it and after a long time swallow it down. We did all of this whilst paying attention to our senses and the sensation of having the sultana in our hands and mouth. Memories of my mother's baking, Christmas and vineyards in Italy were unlocked for the group. We went on to learn meditations that focused on the external and internal world and meditations during which we focused on our breathing; finally we all laid on the floor and experienced a mediation called the 'body scan'. I left the workshop feeling very relaxed and promising myself that I would incorporate mindfulness into my daily routine (and I downloaded the app).</div>
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So what is Mindfulness then? Well, my understanding is that it is an antidote to the society we have created in which we are always busy and where we spend a great deal of time distracting ourselves from our feelings. Mindfulness is about focusing 'in the moment' on our experience and on our selves. That was my experience on Sunday, for once the world stop spinning and I could literally catch my breath.</div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-35679930790207831522012-10-29T11:30:00.000+00:002012-10-29T11:34:50.425+00:00Fine Words from Ed Miliband<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;">It seems as though the British establishment is under a great deal of scrutiny at the moment. Whether it's bankers, the media or BBC celebrities, they're all under the spotlight. Indeed, Nick Cohen in yesterday's </span><i style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;">Observer</i><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;"> penned an </span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/oct/28/nick-cohen-our-angry-society" style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">excellent article</a> <span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;">suggesting that the British are engaged in a 'strange rebellion' ... 'turning on their failed elite and scourging their institutions'. There certainly needed to be, post-Suez, a reduction in the deference we paid to politicians; but I suspect the amount of cynicism around at the moment is a double edged sword. Too much cynicism destroys the trust we have in our institutions and each other. Maybe it's already happened, with the BBC the last institution standing about to topple into the mire. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;">Our politicians are often in the firing line, but there is one area of policy where I'd hoped they might redeem themselves just a little - mental health. This year we had an excellent mental health debate in the House of Commons with </span><a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-18444516" style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">several MPs speaking about their own experience of mental illness</a><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;">. Today the leader of the Labour Party will speak about the need to stop making light of mental illness: </span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2012/oct/29/ed-miliband-time-mentally-ill" style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;">Ed Miliband: time to stop caricatures of mentally ill</a><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;"> He will commit himself to changing the NHS constitution so that individuals living with mental illness have the same rights as those diagnosed with a physical illness. This is good news. Mr Milliband is calling for a change in our culture and a change in policy. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;">But there is a problem. Whilst the Government has announced extra spending on young people's mental health services, </span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2012/mar/26/dementia-research-funding-to-double" style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">dementia research</a><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;"> and just last week </span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2012/oct/25/fund-dementia-patients" style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">an extra £50 million for dementia care</a><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;">, the overall picture for mental health services is of </span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/jun/18/inexcusable-mental-health-treatments-underfunded" style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">cuts to budgets and services</a><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;">, </span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2012/jun/18/mental-illness-people-help" style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">with only one quarter of people living with mental illness getting the help they need</a><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; text-align: justify;">. So whilst our politicians talk about support for mental health provision we might be excused for being a little sceptical, even cynical, if that talk is not accompanied (finally) by adequate funding. Fine gestures from our politicians are welcome but in the words of Walter Mondale,'Where's the beef?'</span>John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-83244256503726681732012-10-23T00:56:00.000+01:002012-10-23T10:20:58.137+01:00Jimmy Savile and Child Abuse<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I've just watched the BBC's <i>Panorama</i>. It investigated the decision by the editor of Newsnight to shelve an investigation into sexual abuse allegations surrounding the late Jimmy Savile. It seems the decision to pull the report was made to protect Savile's name ahead of several tribute shows the BBC had planned to broadcast.</div>
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Over the years numerous BBC people had heard the rumours that Savile was a child molester, and some had witnessed Savile's inappropriate behaviour towards children, but few thought to say anything and Savile's abuse of children continued for decades. </div>
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The amount of distress Savile caused can never be calculated. The victims are to be measured by the hundred. They included children in hospital, patients in Broadmoor, children in care, and BBC visitors, invited by Savile to join the audience of <i>Clunk Click</i>, <i>Top of the Pops</i> or <i>Jim'll Fix It</i>.</div>
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Good God! The man was a legend, part of my childhood, Mr BBC, a children's TV presenter, and all the time he was using his celebrity, wealth, influence, charity work and contacts to groom and abuse children, silence his victims, and avoid detection and prosecution. Watching Savile <span style="font-family: inherit;">now </span>I see what commentators mean when they say he was 'hiding out in the open'. How did he get away with it? </div>
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We now live in a society where safeguarding children is a high priority, yet still there are cases, like Rochdale, where social services fail to intervene and where a blind eye is turned to the sexual abuse of children. But in the 1970s and '80s, when Savile was at the height of his fame and at the depth of his depravity, our society was not at all sensitive to the problem of childhood sexual abuse. Repeatedly interviewees on <i>Panorama </i>said that whilst they disapproved of his behaviour it never occurred to them to report Savile for molesting teenage girls. </div>
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I imagine that many rock stars and celebrities in the 1970s saw the sexual exploitation of young fans as an entitlement rather than a crime. Society as a whole gave no thought to what Savile was doing, preferring to see his heavily sexualised behaviour on TV as playful and harmless. That's why it's shocking to watch: because we now see what was always there but what we did not see before.</div>
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And now the inquiries and investigations begin, and as former Conservative Cabinet Minister, David Mellor said on the radio tonight, 'blood will have blood'. Let us see how this unfolds.</div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-38671183664331311822012-10-15T13:51:00.001+01:002012-10-15T13:56:48.095+01:00Book Review: In the Freud Archives by Janet Malcolm<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Last week I wrote a short review of <a href="http://marsdentherapy.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/book-review-psychoanalysis-impossible.html" target="_blank">Psychoanalysis: the Impossible Profession</a> by Janet Malcolm. This week I finished reading another of Malcolm's books, <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/In-Freud-Archives-Janet-Malcolm/dp/1847085334/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1350298554&sr=8-1" target="_blank">In the Freud Archives</a>. An enjoyable read, finished in a couple of sittings, though I appreciate the book may not have broad appeal. It's about two Freud researchers, Jeffrey Masson and Peter Swales, and their encounter with the psychoanalytic establishment in the USA. It's a fascinating tale and high-class gossip!</div>
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The first researcher we meet is Jeffrey Masson, a professor of Sanskrit and unsuccessful therapist, who seduces the eminent psychoanalyst and long-time secretary of the Freud Archive at the Library of Congress, Dr K. R. Eissler. Very quickly Masson is appointed as Eissler's replacement and tasked with editing a complete edition of Freud's letters to his friend Wilhelm Fleiss. An excellent job Masson does too! </div>
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But whilst working in the archive Masson looks for evidence supporting his view that Freud's initial understanding of the etiology of hysteria was correct, that his patients had indeed been sexually abused. He argues that Freud abandoned this 'seduction theory' because of the hostility of his fellow medical professionals. Wow! The whole basis of psychoanalysis, the Oedipus Complex and Freud's theory of childhood sexuality, questioned by the new keeper of Freud's archive. Masson published his views in a national newspaper and was subsequently removed from his post as secretary of the Freud archive. Masson promptly sued Eissler for $13 million, settling for $150,000. </div>
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Of course it's not the sequence of events that's interesting but rather the personalities involved. Masson comes across as confident and charming, but above all - due to his frankness during interviews - narcissistic. And for that unwanted portrait Masson sued the author of the book - an unsuccessful court case that lasted ten years. Eissler comes across as totally devoted to his beloved Freud, but naive and easily duped. I'm reminded of the priest played by Richard Burton in the 1978 film <i>Absolution</i>:<i> a</i> pious man whose rigid beliefs are no defence against the wickedness of a murderous boy he teaches.</div>
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Masson went on to write two incendiary books:<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> a hatchet job called </span><a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Assault-Truth-Freud-Sexual/dp/0006377394/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&qid=1349620757&sr=8-9" style="background-color: white; color: #888888; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">The Assault on Truth</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> about Freud's abandonment of the seduction theory; </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">and </span><a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_11?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=jeffrey+masson&sprefix=jeffrey+mas%2Caps%2C209" style="background-color: white; color: #888888; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">Against Therapy</a> which is an attack on the unethical practice and power crazed therapists Masson finds in every field of psychotherapy.</div>
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Another researcher graces the pages of this book. Peter Swales is a complex man with an encyclopaedic knowledge of Freud and the origins of psychoanalysis. He calls himself a 'guerilla historian of psychoanalysis'. He too won the confidence of Eissler, who arranged for the Freud archive to gift him $4000 to enable him to continue his research. What Swales comes up with is the closely argued theory that Freud had an affair with his sister-in-law, Minna Bernays, that she became pregnant and that Freud arranged for a termination. So here we are again, Dr Eissler using the Archive's money to fund research intended to harm the reputation of Freud and psychoanalysis.</div>
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So for those Freud anoraks out there I can highly recommend Janet Malcolm's book. Beautifully written, full of wry humour and a nice partner to her other volume, <i>Psychoanalysis: The Impossible Profession</i>..</div>
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<br />John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-34549609710652422042012-10-07T15:46:00.004+01:002012-10-07T16:33:22.980+01:00Book Review: Psychoanalysis: The Impossible Profession by Janet Malcolm<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I recently spotted a tweet from my Twitter pal <a href="https://twitter.com/RuthNinaWelsh" target="_blank">@RuthNinaWelsh</a> saying she'd just bought Janet Malcolm's book, <i>Psychoanalysis: The Impossible Profession</i>. Before I knew it the very same book was in my Amazon basket, along with another by Malcolm, <i>In the Freud Archives,</i> my next big read. I've a weakness for pretty dust jackets and books about psychotherapy and with the help of Amazon I've been able to fill two rooms at my house and office. The Marsden Therapy library! It will certainly fill a large skip when I'm dead and gone.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Janet Malcolm's book fooled me a little. This latest edition was published in 2012, but the book was first published in 1981. Very dated then. It started as an article in <a href="http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/bios/janet_malcolm/search?contributorName=janet%20malcolm" target="_blank">The New Yorker</a>, where Malcolm has been a contributor since 1963, and it's been expanded to 168 pages with detours into Freudian theory and practice. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">At the heart of the book is an extended interview with psychoanalyst "Aaron Green", a 'forty-six-year-old psychoanalyst who practices in Manhattan in the East Nineties' (3). The book is fascinating when it describes the views and experiences of Green, this 'slight man, with a vivid, impatient, unsmiling face' (3). </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">To increase the word count (I suspect) the opinions of Green become departure points for fairly esoteric discussions of Freudian theory and technique (transference, analyzability) and the competing revisions of post-Freudians. In the face of all these revisions Green remains completely loyal to Freud's original conception of psychoanalysis, articulated for Green by his contemporary, Charles Brenner. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The first chapter of the book is something of a potted history of Freud's discoveries, but after that the book becomes much more interesting. The interview with Green casts light on the politics of the New York Psychoanalytic Institute, the eccentricities of the New York Psychoanalytic Society, the manoeuvres and bids for power and status of America's leading analysts in the '70s and '80s. There are insights too - on therapy, on Freud and on human nature - so I'm looking forward to reading my other Malcolm purchase, <i><a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Freud-Archives-Janet-Malcolm/dp/1862075980/ref=sr_1_10?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1349620886&sr=1-10" target="_blank">In the Freud Archive</a></i>, about Jeffrey Masson, who did us all a great service as the editor of the Freud-Fliess letters and then did a hatchet job on Freudian studies and the field of psychotherapy with his two books, <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Assault-Truth-Freud-Sexual/dp/0006377394/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&qid=1349620757&sr=8-9" target="_blank">The Assault on Truth</a> and <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_11?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=jeffrey+masson&sprefix=jeffrey+mas%2Caps%2C209" target="_blank">Against Therapy</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Janet Malcolm, <i>Psychoanalysis: The Impossible Profession</i>, London, Granta. Available from <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Psychoanalysis-Impossible-Profession-Janet-Malcolm/dp/1847085350/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1349616421&sr=8-2" target="_blank">Amazon</a></span><br />
<br />John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-42150558958548966472012-10-01T12:43:00.001+01:002012-10-01T13:02:27.089+01:00Gay Cures and Red Hair<div style="text-align: justify;">
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Yesterday the Guardian published an article on the passing of laws in California to outlaw gay conversion therapy: <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/us-news-blog/2012/sep/30/gay-cure-ban-california">California banishes controversial 'gay cure' therapies to 'dustbin of quackery'</a> Democrat Governor Jerry Brown signed the Bill making California the first state in the Union to outlaw the use of gay conversion practises on children and young people. A victory then for humanity and common sense!</div>
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Meanwhile a letter from the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) drops through the letter box at Marsden Towers. The first 'Statement of Ethical Practice' and one in which the BACP echo the views of the Pan American Health Organisation (PAHO) and the World Health Organisation (WHO) stating that 'practices such as conversion or reparative therapies "have no medical indication and represent a severe threat to the health and human rights of the affected persons".' It goes on to say that 'the diversity of human sexualities is compatible with normal mental health and social adjustment' and concludes, 'BACP believes that socially inclusive, non-judgemental attitudes to people who identify across the diverse range of human sexualities will have positive consequences for those individuals, as well as for the wider society in which they live'.</div>
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These two developments are to be hugely welcomed - victories against the homophobia espoused by the religious right in the UK and America. Unable to accept that God might have created gay people along with everyone else, the religious right push the idea that being gay is a 'lifestyle choice' and inherently sinful or pathological. In my view being gay is as much a choice as being left handed or having red hair. You may know that left handed people were once also persecuted by the Church whilst people with red hair are in a minority and subject to insults from a society with thatches of plain black and mousy brown.</div>
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Can we extend the metaphor and liken gay conversion therapy to hair dye for people ashamed of their red hair? Keep applying the dye if you must, but deep down your hair is still red and will emerge and be restored to its former glory when you're more comfortable with yourself and your natural hair colour. It's so you!<br />
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John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-78561270287684689582012-09-22T15:33:00.002+01:002012-09-22T15:33:26.459+01:00All You Need is Love<div style="text-align: justify;">
Did you read Oliver James in the Guardian this morning? His article, <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/sep/22/oliver-james-love-bombing-children">All you need is love bombing</a>, contains advice to parents on how to help their unhappy and defiant children. What James calls 'love bombing' involves two things: devoting time exclusively to your child and letting the child control what happens in that time. As a result the child experiences what all children need if they are to flourish: love and security. It seems such a simple idea, maybe too simple.</div>
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So my first reaction was favourable: many children in the UK are growing up in families that simply do not meet a child's basic physical, social, psychological, emotional and spiritual needs.This has a huge negative impact on the child's development and on their ability to function well (as children, adolescents and adults) in our fairly unforgiving society. But the remedy is to hand, love and security, and if it isn't ever-present then it needs to be scheduled. Scheduled? Has it come to this? Could it be that James' solution is actually symptomatic of the problem? Have we really created a society where we have to 'find a window' to 'love bomb' our children?</div>
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<br />John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-58746954944394331532012-09-17T20:20:00.000+01:002012-09-18T00:06:21.418+01:00Trauma in Northern Ireland<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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My copy of <i><a href="http://www.therapytoday.net/" target="_blank">Therapy Today</a>,</i> the magazine of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), arrived at the weekend. Inside there was an interview with Helena Stuart, a psychotherapist at The Wave Trauma Centre in Belfast. </div>
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In her interview Helena says that despite the fragile peace in Northern Ireland there is still a big need for trauma counselling. It is, after-all, in the aftermath of conflict, during times of peace, when we are often most vulnerable to the affects of trauma; when we cease coping with the crisis around us and begin processing, experiencing and reliving the traumatic events we have survived. </div>
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One <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2012/jul/25/suicide-rates-northern-ireland-troubles" target="_blank">recent study</a> found that the suicide rate amongst middle-aged men in Northern Ireland has doubled since the Good Friday agreement, further evidence of the difficulties many have coping with the transition to peace. These men grew up when violence in Northern Ireland was at its height and its made them susceptible to mental health problems in later life.</div>
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Helena says that as life in Northern Ireland returns to something like normality the symptoms of trauma begin to appear but not just in those directly affected. She says the effects of trauma are 'reverberating down the generations', affecting adolescents and children aware of but unable to talk about the unspeakable trauma their families have experienced. </div>
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Reading the interview I was reminded of a visit I made in 1992 to Belfast's Museum and Art Gallery on the edge of the Botanical Gardens. I was a philosophy and politics student at Queen's University at the time. There was an exhibition of children's paintings. Those painted by the youngest children, only four or five years old, featured big yellow suns and bright red tractors; but as the children aged the colours became darker, the scenes increasingly bleak. Teenagers painted scenes of violence with military helicopters overhead.</div>
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Helena works creatively with her clients, they paint and use sand play to help symbolise the horror they have experienced. She says, "The symbols of healing appear in the sandbox even when the person themselves hasn't found healing yet. The potential is there and we always grow towards potential'.</div>
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<br />John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-78991731006640053762012-08-19T16:24:00.000+01:002012-08-25T16:36:31.503+01:00Gore Vidal Obituary<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The American writer <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gore_Vidal" target="_blank">Gore Vidal</a> died on 31 July 2012 at the age of 86. And finally I have a Sunday free so I can reflect on his life and pay tribute to the great man of American letters. Gore Vidal was a hero of mine. I admired his intellect and wit, his brilliant essays, interviews and liberal politics. He was urbane but with an acerbic edge. Vidal had the courage of his convictions and over a long life relished his battle with the American right in all its political, social and religious manifestations.</div>
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<a href="http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/61945000/jpg/_61945418_61945417.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="112" src="http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/61945000/jpg/_61945418_61945417.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/61945000/jpg/_61945418_61945417.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a>Gore Vidal's literary output was prodigious: essays, novels, novellas, plays, screenplays and memoirs. His novels varied in quality. The historical novels <i>Burr</i>, <i>Lincoln, Creation</i> and <i>Julian</i> are excellent because Vidal is an expert at combining history with characterisation to produce a compelling narrative.</div>
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His satirical novellas <i>Duluth</i> and <i>Myra Breckinridge </i>are wonderfully shocking and funny; but for me <i>Live from Golgotha</i> and <i>The Smithsonian Institution, </i>like some of his other novels (<i>The Judgment of Paris </i>and <i>Messiah</i>) fall flat. But even so there is something very touching in <i>The Smithsonian Institution</i>. Vidal's main character is a young physics genius working on the neutron bomb and time travel. He uses his time travelling discoveries to visit the battlefield of Iwo Jima and rescue his friend, a young marine killed there. A moving piece of wish fulfilment this: Vidal's friend, an eighteen year old marine called Jimmy Trimble died at Iwo Jima in 1945 and Vidal grieved his loss for the rest of his life.</div>
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Jimmy Trimble also features in <i>The City and the Pillar </i>(1948), an unflinching account of a young gay man's life and his ultimately destructive attachment to his best friend. It's a remarkably frank account now but in 1948 the book caused a storm. Vidal says he was faced with a difficult choice contemplating its publication: he could pursue the political career he wanted, Vidal's grandfather was a United States Senator, or he could publish the book and be damned. He chose the latter course and was subsequently shunned by the establishment and the right-wing press in particular - the battlelines were drawn! Vidal went on to run for high office on the Democratic Party ticket but was unsuccessful. </div>
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Gore Vidal was a good novelist; but, as Martin Amis has said, it's as an essayist that Vidal approaches greatness. He was a master of the wicked turn of phrase, the put-down, the metaphor that sums up an enemy in the most unflattering terms possible. He drew on a vast knowledge of history, politics and literature. Vidal was a voracious reader, a habit that began when he was six, reading to his blind grandfather, Senator Gore of Oklahoma. In his scathing attacks on American foreign policy Vidal drew particularly on classical history, likening the post-war 'security-state' and it's interventions abroad to the late Roman Empire. Vidal mourned the passing of the republic, arguing that the Founding Fathers would not recognise the America of Nixon and Bush. </div>
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In recent years I enjoyed watching videos of Vidal on YouTube and on Websites run by public service television stations in the United States. His legendary row with the sneering William F. Buckley is there and a near punch up too with Norman Mailer. I shall be watching them again, but this time with some sadness rather than relish. As <a href="http://www.economist.com/blogs/prospero/2012/08/remembering-gore-vidal" target="_blank">The Economist</a> says, the passing of Vidal really is the passing of an era. I'm now going to visit Amazon to plug the gaps in my Gore Vidal library and I've added some links below for those who would like to read more about Gore Vidal.</div>
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<b>Gore Vidal Obituaries</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2012/aug/01/gore-vidal-dies" target="_blank">The Guardian</a>, <a href="http://www.independent.co.uk/news/obituaries/gore-vidal-writer-and-commentator-who-bestrode-the-cultural-life-of-america-for-50-years-7999320.html" target="_blank">The Independent</a>, <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/obituaries/9443260/Gore-Vidal.html" target="_blank">The Telegraph</a>, <a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-19074231" target="_blank">BBC News</a>, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EscSkQ0TrrU" target="_blank">BBC Newsnight (YouTube)</a>, <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2012/08/01/books/gore-vidal-elegant-writer-dies-at-86.html?pagewanted=all" target="_blank">The New York Times</a>, <a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/local/obituaries/gore-vidal-dies-imperious-gadfly-and-prolific-graceful-writer-was-86/2012/08/01/gJQAFF7FOX_story.html" target="_blank">The Washington Post</a>, <a href="http://www.bostonglobe.com/2012/08/01/vidalfeeney/Zyk7y7zfgaM0qEeY5QyDlL/story.html" target="_blank">The Boston Globe</a>, <a href="http://www.latimes.com/news/obituaries/la-me-gore-vidal-20120801,0,4557667.story" target="_blank">Los Angeles Times</a>, <a href="http://www.morningstaronline.co.uk/news/content/view/full/122168" target="_blank">The Morning Star</a>, <a href="http://www.usatoday.com/life/people/obit/story/2012-08-01/gore-vidal-dies/56631952/1" target="_blank">USA Today</a>, <a href="http://lareviewofbooks.org/article.php?type=&id=815&fulltext=1&media=" target="_blank">Los Angeles Review of Books</a>, <a href="http://chronicle.com/article/Gore-Vidals-Mistakes-Were/133365/" target="_blank">The Chronicle of Higher Education</a>, <a href="http://www.tnr.com/article/politics/105747/where-have-all-our-racist-aristocrats-gone-requiem-gore-vidal" target="_blank">The New Republic</a></div>
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John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5019324627659892634.post-11196052265127728892012-08-17T14:19:00.003+01:002012-09-17T20:22:27.566+01:00Taming the Black Dog<br />
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">A friend and counselling colleague gave me a copy of Taming the Black Dog. I'm often on the look out for self-help books I can recommend to my clients. Something to replace the classic by Susan Jeffers: <i><a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Feel-The-Fear-And-Anyway/dp/0091907071/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1345209066&sr=8-1" target="_blank">Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway</a></i>. Published in 2004 and written by Patrick Ellverton, <i>Taming the Black Dog</i> is a guide to beating depression, the Black Dog of the title.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;"><span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">Ellverton's book does contain a lot of good advice about healthier eating, exercise and the benefits of keeping a daily log. Ellverton recommends finding a mentor and writes admiringly about his own source of inspiration, Winston Churchill. There's advice on creating a daily regime of walking and prayer (or meditation) to 'restore the balance' and keep the black dog at bay. There's also advice on alcohol misuse whilst another section contains a twenty minute exercise routine. The guidance I personally found most useful was the recommendation to spend time in the evening planning the next day's tasks.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">Ellverton's advice is rooted in a lifetime of coping with depression. Ellverton was an army officer and this too is reflected in his book. You can see from the description I've given that the book has a 'pull yourself up by the bootstraps' quality. He eschews counselling as tending to do more harm than good, though he offers a counselling service on his website.</span><span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;"></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;"><span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">I suspect Ellverton sees counselling as backward looking - a fruitless examination of unhappy past experiences likely to make depression worse. It's certainly true that rumination is a big part of depression and in my work as a counsellor I don't encourage clients to constantly dwell on their misery. I seek to acknowledge distressing memories and current unhappiness but recognise too the client's heroic side and the possibility of change.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">Ellverton sees medication as a way of managing the symptoms of depression in the short-term whilst the depressed person makes changes to his or her thinking, behaviour and lifestyle. I have sympathy with that view and the need for lifestyle changes.</span><span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;"></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;"><span style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">So Ellverton advocates a set of new habits: walking, exercise, playing a musical instrument, prayer, healthy eating and sobriety 'to keep the black dog in its kennel'. Anyone who likes this approach and can follow his prescription will find Ellverton's book helpful - replacing the behaviours that maintain depression with new behaviours that promote good mental health. The only problem is that depression tends to take away the motivation and will power needed to make these changes. If that's the case for you then maybe some kind of therapy might be helpful.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Tahoma; text-align: -webkit-auto;">Taming the Black Dog is available on Amazon <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Taming-Black-Dog-depression-colleagues/dp/1857039998/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1345208316&sr=1-4" target="_blank">here</a> </span></div>
John Marsdenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09923274939077713721noreply@blogger.com0